As I write this, it's a couple of days before Hollis' second birthday. I woke up this morning and thought of where I was two years ago: unbelievably pregnant, 41-ish weeks, scared, nervous, excited, impatient. I was also childless.
Even though his entry into my life was 4 days away I could argue that he was practically here since he was affecting every aspect of my life to a large degree. But it's true, he wasn't really here, yet. I hadn't heard his sweet little voice, or smelled his scent, or felt his soft, buttery warmth. He was a figment of my imagination - lo, he wasn't even a "he," yet, but just "the baby" inside me. I hadn't yet experienced that Mama Bear phenomenon I'd always read about, but never felt. My heart hadn't yet learned of what it was truly capable: massive, mind-blowing, conscience-clearing, soul-bending L O V E and devotion.
For so long now Hollis and I have been sharing a wonderful life together. Two years of daily loving contact. Think about it. It's not that common for many people on this planet to experience such joy and safety as he and I share as a pair. I expect our honeyed days to go on for many more years, too, because I believe in magic and I believe in us as a family.
He is a special human being with trait combinations I would never have concocted myself, but yet are so harmonious in his little being that I cannot paint a more perfect picture: He is precocious, but gently so. He is inquisitive, yet cautious. He is self-deprecating and quick to laugh at himself, but also determined and diligent. He never gets discouraged, finds wonder in, literally, anything within sight or touch, and is fiercely loving in an on-my-terms-only-toddler-way.
I am overwhelmingly happy to know this tiny little person and I am beyond giddy to get to know him as he grows into a man. A man I hope can look back on his childhood with laughter, mirth and love and know that his momma and daddy were there for him every step of the way.
Happy Birthday, Little Man! I love you!
10/9/08 7:30 am when I woke him up.
10/9/09 ~ 8:30 am on my pillow. He was up at 7 due to a storm and had been laying on Daddy on the couch watching Toy Story 2 until he came in to see me.
[Ed. note: Here's his 1st birthday post.]