Things I wish someone had told me, Part 2: The must-haves & don't-buys

ErgoBaby carrier - the best for huge, fat babies who can't walk, yet.

This is Part 2 of a Things I Wish Someone Had Told me. Part 1 is here.

When I got pregnant I had absolutely NO CLUE what a parent needed to take care of their infant. I actually had to do research on it! Even now I can't help but shake my head and roll my eyes at that. Parenthood is truly an alternate universe that we are thrust into the moment our little one arrives. I remember going to Babies R Us with Anthony to finish our registry. I had done the bulk of work online to save us the torture of having to zap a thousand little doodads by hand. It still melted down into a full blown anxiety attack for Anthony and a tight-lipped, white-knuckled, don't scream in public fiasco for me.

I wish like hell someone had known enough to tell me what to do and where to go. I would have avoided Babies R Us if I could have, but I had no idea what else was out there.

So, here's a list of the things you really need to get for Baby.

Less than 20 Things Baby Must-Have:

1. Lap pads - You can make any flat surface into your changing table with these versatile lap pads.
2. Baby sling or carrier - Baby wearing is great for both the baby and the mama. Baby feels safer and closer and all his signals are easily picked up by Mom and Mom gets to remain close to her little one while also carrying more weight, which helps in shedding the pregnancy weight. Seriously.
   
3. Diaper bag - You know this one is my fav.
   
4. Shitload of diapers - Either sign up for a cloth diaper service or get baby-friendly diapers like 7th Generation.
5. Wipes or cotton pads - Wipes aren't necessary, you could use cotton pads, but you gotta have one or the other
6. Baby cream & Diaper rash creams - The baby cream needs to be uber gentle (I used Weleda Baby Cream) and I highly recommend the Avalon Organics Diaper Cream. Update: It's been brought to my attention that I failed to qualify this. Basically, you only need these if your baby gets a rash or dries out terribly, but it's not a given. I just think it's good to have them on hand, in case.
   
7. Baby laundry detergent and dryer sheets - We used 7th Generation Baby Detergent for HE washers and "free" dryer sheets.
   
8. Baby tub and wash - Although, you only need to give Baby a sponge bath until the umbilical stump falls off, so, ostensibly, you could push this one out a couple of weeks if you wanted to. Update: Or even make it a NICE TO HAVE if you trust the cleanliness of your sink. You could also line your tub with towels and do a mini-bath that way if your back can handle it. Re: the wash we used Weleda Baby Wash (it doesn't suds up) when Hollis was teeny and graduated to Avalon Organics once he was older.
   
9. Thermometer- Update: For clarification, Baby's temp can be taken under the arm in most cases, so a traditional under-the-tongue kind works great.
   
10. Car seat - Keep in mind that when your wee one is wee, you may want your car seat to be mobile so you can bring it in to restaurants, etc. Infant/Toddler convertible car seats don't have this feature. If you plan on always holding/wearing Baby whenever you're out and about, it may not be such a big deal and therefore the cheaper convertible car seat may be your best bet.
    
11. Sleep sack or Swaddle blankets - Two sleep sacks (to have in rotation if one is in the wash) and 3-4 swaddle blankets. These are either or. You don't use them both together. Parents who use one, usually don't use the other.
12. A diaper changing bag for the car with a spare outfit- You need all your diaper and butt cleaning gear in the car, too. Trust me, there will be days you forget the diaper bag at home and it's a life saver to have a back up in the car.
13. Blankets
    
14. Bassinet or Co-Sleeper - If you're worried about bed-sharing, then buy a little bed for your little one for your room. Of course, you'll also have to buy the appropriate bedding, too.
    
15. Diaper pail - You need something to contain the stink. I wish I had a Diaper Champ, but any one will do the job.
    
16. Comfy chair to sit in - I know this may seem to not belong in my list, but truly, it is. If you can spare any money for this, you definitely should!
17. Bouncer - (How could I have forgotten this!) As a SAHM alone a bouncer allowed me to take a shower or cook a meal. If you only have one set of arms, a bouncer gives you just a tad more freedom to do everyday tasks. It's supposed to be just a short-term rest stop, though. I never used it for more than I needed to to accomplish a certain task. Babies need to be held!
    
18. Dr. Sears' The Baby Book: Everything You Need to Know About Your Baby from Birth to Age Two - This book is invaluable due to Dr. Sears' years of experience as a pediatrician. He lays to rest any worries over the choking noises a newborn makes and gives you step-by-step instructions for CPR. This book has been the Baby Encyclopedia in our house and it's been a life saver and a mind saver. It's also a terrific reference for how attachment parenting works.
    
19. Clothes - Depending on the season the baby is born in, this list can be modified:

• 5-10 onesies, depending on how often you want to do laundry
• 5-7 baby sleepers or nightgowns
• 1 cold weather sleeper if necessary
• 5-7 pairs of baby socks
• 1-2 newborn hats, depending on climate

In my opinion, Baby Don't-Buys:

1. Matching bedding with blanket, pillows, bumper, etc. - Baby only needs a place to sleep. Blankets are considered dangerous for at least 9 months due to suffocation (at 9 mos, most babies can roll over and remove the blanket from her face). And the whole "suite" of decor is just a marketers way of getting you to shell out more money.
2. Changing table - some will totally disagree with me on this, but it's not a must have, it's a NICE TO HAVE
3. Diaper holder - Pointless waste of money. You can get a basket or use an old canvas bag and set it anywhere near where you change your baby.
4. Wipe warmer - Baby won't be harmed if you use a cold wipe on his tushy. More money down the drain.
5. Crib - Baby will be safe and happy in your bed. If you're concerned about bed-sharing, there are things you can buy that your baby sleeps in on your bed, but a bigger sleeping apparatus isn't necessary until Baby is much older.
   
6. Bottles and accoutrements - Don't be scared into believing that your breasts "might not work." Having a bottle and formula around may undermine your breastfeeding efforts.
7. Baby proofing stuff - You'll need this stuff once they start crawling, but definitely not a moment sooner.
   
8. Bibs - Baby drools a lot. Big deal. Don't be so anal!
9. Highchair - Wait on this one, too. Baby won't be eating solids any sooner than 4 months, so save your money.
10. Stroller - For those long days shopping and your back can't possibly take another second of carrying the baby around. This happened for me around 20 lbs and 5 months. It's not a must have for an infant. Save your cash until you're begging for a stroller.
    
11. Special baby towels - Your smaller house towels work just fine.
12. Baby first aid - Nothing; medicines are not safe for babies. The only time they would be on any is if they are SERIOUSLY ill and being treated by a doctor. Saline drops for stuffy noses is fine, but if you breastfeed, your milk works great for that! Also, you can use your milk to heal ear infections and cure conjunctivitis. *I'm not a doctor. This is what I learned from my midwife and pediatrician.
    
13. Breastfeeding pillow - Any old pillow in your house will do the job just as well as that $40 Boppy.
14. Breastpump - Unless you know for sure that you will be pumping, save the $200 and pass. New moms are always told to buy a pump "just in case," but it's hogwash. It's an expensive investment and not one that is a necessity unless your situation requires it (i.e., going back to work while still nursing).
15. Any specialized gadget - Just ask yourself, "Is this required for my baby's happiness and health? If money is no object, then by all means, indulge, but you really don't need 95% of the things out there.
16. Mobile - It's another NICE TO HAVE, but not a must have.
    

Once you get your feet wet you'll have a better idea of what you want. Some of my favorite stores for all little widgets, safety items, and toys are:

• Baby Age - Online store that has everything imaginable
• One Step Ahead - Terrific (and sometimes unique) selection of all things child-centric
• The Baby's Gallerie - Online super store for all things

Here's a more extensive list. Also, Cool Mom Picks is a great resource for handmade, safe, "mom approved" items.

Well, that's about it! I'll update and bump this post up as I think of new things to add. To you veteran moms, keeping in the "frugal, must-have only" vein, are there any things I forgot?

Good luck, Bri, Clara, Craig, and Larry!! I hope this helps even a teeny tiny bit!! Love you!

What's in a diaper bag?

Their product blurb says it all:

…smart, that sums it up. You’re smart so your bag should be too…friendly pockets make it easy to tote along the stuff…and anti-microbial linings let you worry about having fun, not fighting germs…colorful linings make it even more like you…a surprise on the inside

My sister actually shelled out the $130 for this bag at Nordy's (thanks, Sissy Poo!). I'm not sure if I would have ponied up like that, but boy am I glad my sister did. This bag rocks. After a year and a half it still looks good as new (no dirt, no fraying, no slouching, the straps are firmly attached).

I highly recommend it!

Teeth hurt!

I've found these two products to be crucial to helping manage Hollis' teething pain.

I used Camilia when he was an infant, and "graduated" to the Hylands teething tablets when he was eating solid foods (even though the bottle says it's fine to give to an infant).

I've only been able to find the Camilia at Wholefoods. The Hylands tablets are almost everywhere.

The thing I like most about Camilia is that you can buy a box of 20 doses and stash 5 all over the place (your purse, pocket, at grandma's, in the car, etc.).

Hollis loved the Camilia liquid doses and would instantly start to feel better whenever he saw me grab one. He eventually felt the same way about the tablets.

Good luck!

Menu Plan: Week of May 11th

This week I have $100 left for groceries, which works out well since I accidentally spent last week's budget on some of this week's food. Yeah, I do that kind of thing sometimes.

If I haven't said it before, I gotta say the $200 a week for food and necessities is working out pretty well. Makes me feel a whole lot more in control, anyway. And that's what we're always striving for: control, control, control!

Mon: Boxed deener - Anthony's seeing Star Trek again with Terry
Tues: Chipotle pork tacos
Weds: Pork and mango lettuce wraps for a late Mother's Day/early birthday dinner with GF carrot cake
Thurs: Baked sea scallops
Fri: E/O
Sat: Artichokes with two sauces, cocktail shrimp, and pasta with lemon sauce
Sun: Lemon-rosemary crusted roasted chicken

Where, oh where did my pacifier go?

If you decide to let your kids have a paci (a.k.a. plug, soother, boopy, doopy, lolli, and what have you) you will soon learn that they are a mysterious, wily lot. They don't like to be constrained to a certain area, preferring to roam free in search of dust bunnies and dirt in the most remote corners of your car, purse, house, and - really - universe.

Enter a pacifier attacher! It comes in a plethora of sizes, colors, and styles and with all the accompanying prices.

I have used just your basic Target option, but have always coveted more stylish versions, like these.

I have a paci-on-a-leash in the car and one in my purse. They have been life savers when I've been out and about with Hollis since he LOVES to toss things over the edge of his car seat and stroller (as all toddlers do). It's also great on a plane because I don't have to dig around for a paci in that tight-ass constrained space.

PS: While you're here, please sign this petition for toxic-free baby bottles.

Menu Plan: Week of May 4th

Anthony's back and so I'm off my boxed meals and ice cream dinners. I'm at once happy and sad about that: happy I get to flex my creative muscles again, sad that I have more dishes to do. C'est la vie.

I've already spent $115 this week, so I have another $85 to go. That includes a giant box of Huggies until I get my research done on which diaper covers are the best as I transition back to cloth diapers (more on that in a later post).

Since I've been eating so lightly for the past two weeks, the idea of anything super heavy is a real turn off. This week's menu plan reflects that:

Mon: Salmon cakes with spring mix salad
Tues: Herbed goat-cheese and portobello mushroom panini with arugula
Weds: Boxed goodies (Anthony's out of town for a night)
Thurs: Spaghetti with roasted tomato and basil
Fri: E/O - It's Anthony's birthday!!
Sat: Mom's - She doesn't know it, yet
Sun: Roast pork loin with a chipotle-maple glaze and vegetables - I think I'm going to start doing a big dinner on Sundays to build L/O momentum for the rest of the week.

Yay! Food!!!

It's freakin' HUGE

About a month ago my laptop was officially laid to rest. It had zero space left in its memory, it took forever to download things, forget about even trying to watch a video on it, the enamel was worn off where wrists had rubbed it over the years, Hollis had broken its little neck, so to speak, and therefore the screen flopped around and had to be propped up in order to work, the chord was frayed and you had to jiggle it *just so* in order to get the juices flowing...

Basically, it was fucked.

It had honestly not occurred to me that we might get a new computer. I'm not a gear head; I don't buy gadgets of any kind. My iPhone was inherited, I use the radio in my car, I was gifted an iPod and iPod Shuffle that I never use pretty much just because they're thingamabobs and I can't be bothered. Anthony had a whole different idea, however. He saw our limping and battered house computer as an avenue to a bright and shiny video game world. Thus, our Gigantic Beauty was born.

I'm mostly over the embarrassment of having such an ostentatious piece of equipment standing naked in the middle of my house. But I'm far from feeling casual about it when people come over and see it jutting its shiny black screen out for all to see. I almost want to say to it, "Hey, could you tone it down a little?? Just for tonight?"

Sometimes it feels like it's watching me throughout the day, no matter where I am in the front of the house. How could it not?? It's so damned big! It can probably see into my neighbor's house across the street.

You can't NOT see it. It's like the freaking sun: bright, glaring, and omnipresent.

Do you see what I see?? (The view from our front door)

And yet, it is utterly wondrous. I can download pictures from email in 2 seconds flat, not 25; my letters appear as fast as I can type them; I can have multiple tabs open in multiple windows; I can edit photos - lo! I can have PhotoShop open even!; the speakers work; the video is AMAZING; I can zip from place to place, back and forth, up and down and without a delay or a crash!; and I know I have yet to even scratch the surface (I'm getting worked up just thinking about its marvelousness!)!

It also gave me the fabulous (and warranted) excuse to buy a new lamp. Previously on my grandmother's buffet were two small, silver lamps, but they were dwarfed by the back of the monitor and you could see the chords and what not. I actually had to buy a lamp with the biggest shade I could find just to provide some cover, cuz who wants to stare at the back of someone's head and see their tags sticking out while eating dinner? - Well, probably a lot of people wouldn't care, but that's not how I roll. I want shit tucked away.

Lamp shade camouflage. Can you see it now? (View from dining room table)

I love, love, love my little office space in the heart of our house and this mammoth monitor and fancy-dancy computer kinda make me feel more like a grownup. Like, we have real, nice shit now. Not crap duct taped together because we're too disorganized to replace it.

It's weird how I get embarrassed over having nice things. I hid my iPhone from the general public for weeks because I felt like they'd judge me, "Oh she's one of those people," meaning I'd stood in line for a week to get the damn thing. Like I really care what anyone thinks about me? Eventually, I come to my senses and just relax and live my life.

I think it deserves a name, my new, precious computer, he/she who helps make my life easier and more vast (I don't blame it in the least for my compunctions). So go on with your big, bad self, Computer. Shine on and be brilliant and righteous. You have a friend in me.

The perk of having friends

We all know that friends are spectacular people and necessary for emotional happiness, but did you know that friends are also great for getting you to clean your house?

Yep. I don't care how good a friend it is, I'm gonna pick up the rooms they'll be in and clean the bathroom they'll be using. I am willing to do whatever it takes to provide a clean, pleasant space to chill in, even if that means piling my bed with crap and shutting the door. And locking it.

Before MK came over last night:





And after.




I understand that it might not look all that different to the untrained eye - sniff - but it's much different. Things are straightened, tidied, cleansed, and "righted." I've been pretty relaxed about clutter and cleaning while Anthony's been gone. I'm usually a Clutter Nazi when he's around because he's the I'll-put-it-*HERE*THERE*EVERYWHERE*-type of guy - don't even get me started on "his" garage (love you, hoobie!).

Anyway, after thinking about how much I love my friends and all they do for me, they also give me a clean house. How great is that?? Friends are the best.

And she sits back in her nice and tidy house and exhales...

Pacifier on the go

Simple and wonderful.

These are the best damn pacifiers for travel. Jam one in your purse, the car console, or your pocket and know that it's about as clean as can be in a pinch.

I use cap-less pacis at the house and attached to the car seat, but I have one of these in my purse and diaper bags. LOVE 'EM!

Avalon Organics Baby Products

I've tried about half a dozen different baby washes, lotions, and diaper creams and none can compare to Avalon Organics line of baby products. I wish I knew about this stuff right out of the gate.

They're non-greasy, cruelty-free, organic, smooth, have nice, light scent, and are really, really good at their job. Not to mention they're moderately priced, which is a bonus.

The body wash suds up just right and rinses off easily.

The lotion is super moisturizing, but totally not greasy or super wet like some others (Burt's Bees, for example is super slippery and takes forever to soak in).

And the diaper cream is by far the best I've used. It's thick, effective, and not overpowering with its scent.

If you're not sure about making the $10/bottle investment, you can always try out their Little Traveler pack of diaper cream, lotion, and body wash. (That's how I discovered them, actually. I needed travel-sized baby stuff.)



PS: This is strictly my own opinion. I'm just trying to pass on what I've learned in the last 18 months. I wish someone could have told me half of what I've had to learn on my own...

Thanks for the $6.99!!!

I'm not kidding.

Thank you to all you folks out there who have so kindly clicked on all the weird ass Goggle ads you've been seeing lately underneath my posts. Thus far, I have earned $6.99!!

And I really must be random to be generating ads for visiting Madrid, losing weight, and endoscopic spinal surgery.

Apparently, I won't get a check until a $10 threshold is met hahahahahahaha. So, if you want, go ahead and click. If not, no worries! I will forever remember that I almost earned $6.99!

If I even make $10 a month I will be thrilled! That means it will pay for a week's worth of Kombucha drinks and I won't feel guilty to get my raw-drink-buzz on.

Avalon Organics Ultimate Moisture Cream

Ahh, just right.

I have oily, dry, acne-prone skin. I think dermatologists call this "sensitive." I have tried dozens of moisturizers and none of them really do what I want, which is to nourish my skin and NOT cause break outs.

I've tried everything from $75 serums to $8 lotions, all to no avail, until now.

I don't trust review websites for products because I think that some how, some way they're getting paid for their lip service. My review here is just because I want to share what I know with my frenz. I love finding out about new products from my girlfriends. I assume you're all the same.

So, imagine my surprise, when I randomly chose an organic, cruelty-free cream on sale at Whole Foods called Avalon Organics Ultimate Moisture Cream.

It's rockin' my world.

It wiped out some terrible flakiness I had going on in about 3 days and it hasn't made me break out. It's light, smooth, and is quickly absorbed. The lavender scent is "just so" and isn't over powering.

So if you're in the market for some face cream, give this stuff a try.

Menu Plan: Week of April 13th

The whole $200 cash per week thing worked out well last week. I spent $182 on food and household items. I spent $90 for food and baby stuff this weekend so I've got to be pretty frugal the rest of the week considering I need shampoo, TP, and paper towels (that's gonna take a big bite out of my budget).

I accidentally bought pork loin last week instead of short ribs so at least I have some fancy schmancy meat to cook with (although, I'm not all that crazy about pork - sigh).

Friday can't come fast enough, though, because that's another pay day. Yay for pay days!!!

Here's what I got:

Mon: L/O (sorry, Anthony, but you'll be having more soup tonight)
Tues: Roasted pork with chipotle-maple glaze
Weds: Pork and mango lettuce wraps
Thurs: Chipotle pork tacos
Fri: Cajun shrimp boil
Sat: Pantry raid
Sun: L/O

Making more to store with the pork has shrunk my weekly grocery list to a quarter of what it usually is (yay!). Hopefully it'll save a bunch of $$$, too.

As a side note, my eczema has been killing me this past week, therefore this week's meal is based on whole foods only. No condiments that aren't made from scratch, no mysterious fish sauces or seasonings. Also, no allergens like gluten, lactose, or citric acid (made from Aspergillus). Next week will be much of the same. And the week following that. And the week following that. I'm already 4 hours late on my air humping appointment today, so I gotta get to it.

Peace out.

Update:
Mon: L/O (sorry, Anthony, but you'll be having more soup tonight) Update: Egg salad sandwiches with homemade potato chips (I forgot we had Easter eggs!)
Tues: Roasted pork with chipotle-maple glaze, acorn squash and red onion Update: Oh SNAP! I outdid myself with this one!! Here's the recipe.
Weds: Pork and mango lettuce wraps Update: Wow!
Thurs: Chipotle pork tacos Update: Wow wow!
Fri: Cajun shrimp boil Update: This was freakin' AWESOME
Sat: Pantry raid Update: Papa Murphy's pizza - and I paid for it, too, if ya know what I mean...
Sun: L/O

Holy wheels, Batman! Look at that stroller!

Riding in s-t-y-l-e.

WOWZA. That's all I have to say about this website about strollers. Why on earth it never turned up when I was researching strollers 2 years ago is beyond me, but boy, howdy, am I glad I found it now (testament to the power of Twitter)!

I actually have plans to get a Phil and Ted's double inline stroller, Dash, once baby #2 is on its way (whenever that is). I'll need about 9 months to save for it, but I know that quality comes with a cost, so... whatev. I'll deal.

I saw one in person while Christmas shopping this last winter and was enamored on the spot. The little kid gets to ride in the back and the big kid's in the front! You might think that's the short end of the stick, but if they're little enough to fit back there, they certainly won't care that their view is of the bulging backside of their big brother or sister. And what's so cool about it is that you can buy the single and add the attachment later on.

Anyhoo, for all you moms and moms-to-be out there, you should definitely check out Let's Go Strolling. They have a great variety of ways to look for your stroller: brand, feature, or interest. The only drawback is you can't search by price, but it's not that big of a deal since it's so neatly organized. They even have stroller consultation services! I could've used those a while back.

Happy shopping!

Menu Plan: Week of April 6th

So, after last week's money debacle Anthony and I put Plan B into effect. We signed up for Mint.com per a couple of friends' suggestions (thanks Bri and Tom) and we agreed to start doing our finances together (as opposed to just me). Anthony will be the "manager" and is responsible for making sure we stick to the plan. I am the executor of said plan and handle all the monies. We will pay bills together (read: Anthony participating from the couch with me at the computer) and I will start taking out cash for groceries each week. This week, we allotted $200. So far, I've spent $40 and I still need to get this week's food.

Mon: Rosemary Tuscan chicken (this will happen tonight, although, I could be a lying)
Tues: Portobello panini with herbed goat cheese (we've had this once before and it's delish)
Weds: Ratatouille
Thurs: Quinoa pasta with tomato and veggies
Fri: Provençal vegetable soup
Sat: Linguini with chipotle-cherry pork sausage, and red-pepper chard
Sun: BBQ short-ribs

UPDATE:
WHAT REALLY HAPPENED THIS WEEK:
Mon: Rosemary Tuscan chicken (this will happen tonight, although, I could be a lying) I did this instead.
Tues: Portobello panini with herbed goat cheese (we've had this once before and it's delish) Goat cheese was moldy: instead I made Hot Cheese Sandwiches with Portabello Mushroom and Arugula
Weds: Ratatouille (Update: as per the norm for this seek, I didn't have an ingredient for this -the eggplant- so I used butternut squash instead. It was FABULOUS. I actually liked it better!)
Thurs: Quinoa pasta with tomato and veggies (aka leftover ratatouille)
Fri: Provençal vegetable soup
Sat: Linguini with chipotle-cherry pork sausage, and red-pepper chard Ate at Mom's
Sun: BBQ short-ribs Quinoa with roasted-pepper sausage and red bells in paprika cream sauce, with a side of sauteed brussel sprouts (Update: Wholefoods was out of the chipotle-cherry sausage - pfft. And of course I forgot to buy the pasta)

I feel like shite

Confession: I'm in charge of our finances and I am consistently screwing them up.

Today we overdrafted.

*Gasp*

That's right. We were at a negative balance for about 5 minutes before overdraft kicked in and I transferred more cash over to our checking account.

So, look. I want to remove this veil of secrecy we all feel about our money. I mean, it's just money, right? I'm not telling you some deep, dark secret; I'm not telling you anything personal or disgusting; I'm not telling you anything that you, yourself, probably haven't gone through already. I'm tired of always speaking in tongues about my finances.

I want to just be honest about them. I've attempted to do that with the menu plans and my weekly financial goals.

I'm not an idiot: I have a very complex spreadsheet outlining every penny we need to spend, save, and have fun with. It's projected out until the end of the year. I can tell you exactly how much money we have left to pay on our credit cards. I can tell you which bills will automatically draft. I can tell you how much cash is left after bills are paid. I can even estimate the cost of living in another city based on city financial data and my past spending habits.

Sadly, even with all this preparation and diligence me and money are like you and your old college buddy after a long separation: you go out, think you can handle it, but end up with a raging hangover and gory details about your friend's divorce you never wanted to know rattling around in your head. In other words: I over do it and have no boundaries.

Anthony dies a little every time I say, "Um... we need to talk." Like this morning. I got a Wells Fargo notification that our account had dipped below $150. I immediately went to my online banking and checked in. Not only were we below $150, we were at exactly -$10.

What. The. Fuck.

Last I knew, we had approximately $250 in there and it wasn't supposed to go anywhere.

I checked my trusty spreadsheet and sure enough, we should have that money. The bank, however, told a different story. Our insurance had automatically drafted two days earlier than I had expected (I expected it to draft out on 4/3 (payday), but it drafted yesterday, even though it drafted 3/3 last month). So, there you go.

To make matters worse, we were supposed to have $1000 buffer (to avoid EXACTLY this), but I had spent it on tickets and hotel to Phoenix (to visit my ailing grandmother - and it's somehow important for me to include that she's "ailing" and this isn't some selfish "I'm gonna go visit my grandma, cuz I want to" kind of trip), landscaping materials, a mistaken additional $112 to Citibank instead of the City of Austin, and groceries (by the way, my $50 trip yesterday ended up being $95 for those of you keeping track).

And POOF, that $1000 is gone.

To make matters worse, I, quite literally, counted my chickens before they were hatched and spent money we are expecting from Anthony teaching a motorcycle safety class last weekend.

Oy.

As a housewife, homemaker, SAHM, WHATEVER, it's my JOB to do our finances. I take it extremely seriously, and yet, I routinely get us into this financial situation. It doesn't matter that come Friday we'll have our buffer back or that we'll have plenty of cash for food and fun. The fact is that no matter how hard I try, I fail. And it's humiliating and frustrating and and and...

Anthony says that he wants to take over the finances for a while. I cringe at that. I have to have access to our monies since I'm the one spending it all the time (right or wrong). But I'm going to have to let go a little on this and see how he does it. Obviously, my way is NOT working.

And why is this all so hard to admit to? Why does everyone shroud their cash situation in such hush-hush privacy? Even people who are doing well and know what the hell's going on don't talk about it. It ruins marriages, friendships, relationships. Lottery winners lose all their friends because everyone else starts hating them for their good luck. Well, I guess everyone should feel better about themselves knowing that I'm fucking up, right? I mean, I do when I hear about the dire financial situations of others. I think, "Thank God that's not me!"

Thankfully, I haven't ruined us financially. We're still on track to be credit card debt free by mid-summer and all bills are paid, etc., but it still fucking sucks to be so damn back asswards about this. Why can't I just get this right? It's just like diet and exercise for me: I start out with incredible intentions, but then fall flat on my ass.

I feel like I'm taking such an incredible risk by posting this, too. I feel like I'm leaving myself open for criticism and judgement. I so wish this weren't my reality, but it is. And I'm willing to air my dirty laundry if for no other reason than to let others know they're not alone.

I have dozens of really great sources for being frugal: blogs, newsletters (thanks, Bri), and books. I'm not ignorant about what to do, I'm just not doing what I need to do. Just like when I have that extra helping of food. I know better, but do it anyway.

I am going to start listening to all the good advice in my big, fat brain and I'm going to let Anthony step in and help me out in this (I think that might be the hardest part of this). I'm not going to try, I'm going to do.

As the ever wise and all knowing Yoda says, "Do or do not. There is no try."

Props go out to Mommy Confessions for her confessional posts. That takes serious guts.

Menu Plan: Week of March 30th

We're out of money again (sorta), which means I'm back to pantry-diving for this week's meals.

Mon: Garlic shrimp with spaghetti squash
Tues: Quinoa pasta with tomato and herbs
Weds: Sweet potato mash with green beans Update: Quinoa caprese
Thurs: Quinoa caprese Update: E/O - Mom and Terry's treat
Fri: E/O Update: Fish tacos with chutney salsa sauce and wild rice and lentil pilaf.
Sat: Rosemary Tuscan chicken (it WILL happen this week, I swear!! Don't look here or here) Update: Steak, Swiss chard, oven-roasted potatoes
Sun: Steak, Swiss chard, oven-roasted potatoes Update: Mom's spaghetti (care of Mom)

Money goal is $50 or less. I have to get some basics for Hollis, some chicken breasts and a steak, Swiss chard and sweet potatoes. Let's see if I hit it. Wish me luck!

Update: I spent about $98 at the grocery store filling in my supplies. GRR.

Update #2: Apparently, Rosemary Tuscan chicken is still eluding me...

Cleaning with a Twist [Euro Sponge #10]

I'm always up for trying new, "green" products, so when I spotted these Twist cloths and sponge at Newflower Farmers Market today, I had to grab them.

The big cloth (which boasts that it does the work of 17 rolls of paper towels) was under $2. The sponges a buck-something, and the smaller cloth was also under $2. Ok, so I'm liking them already.

They're also 100% biodegradable and made from products safe for the home (i.e., no toxins, plastics, etc.)

I'll let you guys know if they're any good.

But, seriously. The marketing lingo on the back says, "Here's a twist. The package you're holding can be converted into a fiesty little bird feeder. Satisfy your crafty side and try a little hands-on recycling."

Say, wha-?? Do these things scream "bird feeder" to you??


Update: I've been using the big cloth for about a week now and I love it! I put it in the dishwasher (as per the packaging) when I thought it needed to be spruced up and it came out perfect! No fraying or flaking. My only concern is how do I know I've used it to the equivalent of 17 rolls of paper towels? The loofah sponge is also rocking my world. Just as good as any industrial, synthetic sponge I've ever used. I'll keep updating if things change.

Menu Plan: Week of March 23rd

Last week I totally fell off my menu plan wagon. I got sick on Tuesday, had guests, went out on Friday night, blah, blah, blah. I did make the portobello goat cheese panini (I'll post that recipe later) and it was fabu.

This week I'm back on my 21 Day fitness diet (day 9). Here's what we've got going (some are repeats from last week since I never got around to cooking them):

Mon: Rosemary Tuscan chicken with couscous pilaf Crap
Tues: Shrimp scampi with salad More crap
Weds: WTFE (what the fuck ever - Anthony's doing day travel and won't be back until late)
Thurs: Grilled salmon with asparagus
Fri: Warm steak & potato salad
Sat: Firehouse hot chicken sausage chili (I made this a week ago or so and it was fucking delicious. Recipe is below)
Sun: L/O

We hosted brunch yesterday and spent $100 on food (and here, I thought by hosting we'd save money! Why am I always SO wrong about this stuff??). And earlier in the week I spent about $100. I guess $200 for the week isn't too bad, although that doesn't include a $120 dinner out on Friday night.

- As a quick aside, if money were no object I wouldn't buy diamonds, a new car, or get plastic surgery. I would buy whatever food item I wanted, whenever I wanted. I would never feel guilty for getting the expensive cheeses or wines, the organic oatmeal instead of the super cheap regular, the organic, lactose-free milk or the $5 natural organic butter. I would purchase the best ingredients for me and my peeps and we would live a rich and diverse food life full of nutrients and color GUILT FREE. Because as it stands now, I think we eat pretty damn well, but it's not guilt free. At least not on my part. I read articles all the time about how to hit $100 a week on groceries and quite frankly, I don't want to eat meat and potatoes every day, or forego nice tea, but because of this decision I feel guilty because our food expenses is the one place we can actually cut back. -

This is even better the next day

Firehouse Hot Chicken Sausage Chili
Serves: 4
Prep time: 10 minutes
Cook time: 23 minutes

Ingredients
1 T olive oil
3 garlic cloves, smashed
1/2 cup chopped scallions, divided
1 lb hot chicken sausage, removed from casing
2 T chili powder
1/2 tsp cayenne powder
1 28 oz can crushed tomatoes
1 15 oz can crushed tomatoes
1 red bell pepper, diced
1 cup carrot, diced
1/2 T brown sugar
Pinch of salt

Directions
In a large sauce pan, heat oil over med-high heat until hot, but not smoking. Toss in garlic and all but 2 T scallions and cook, stirring frequently, for 1 minute.

Add chicken and conitue to cook, breaking up meat with a wooden spoon, for 2-3 minutes or until browned.

Stir in chili and cayenned powders and cook for 1 minute more.

Add tomates, kidney beans, bell pepper, carrot, brown sugar, and salt.

Bring to a boil over hight heat. Reduce heat to low, cover, and simmer for 15-20 minutes, or until slightly thickened (you don't want soup).

Divide among 4 bowls and garnish with remaining 2 T scallions. Top with a dollop of sour cream.

Menu Plan: Week of March 16th

Here we go again.

My friend, Bob, is coming to Austin tonight via Winnipeg for SXSW (yay, Bob!!). He's a vegetarian so I have a couple of veggie dishes planned for the nights he's with us. I'm still doing that 21 Day workout thing and am using their menu suggestions (it's going ok so far - today is Day 8 - and the recipes are actually quite good).

I'm still shooting for a grand total of $200 on groceries this week; hoping for $100, including any random household items.

Mon: Portobello panino with herbed goat cheese
Tues: Quinoa caprese Update: Domino's pizza
Weds: Almond-crusted fish and chips
Thurs: Shrimp scampi with salad Update: L/O
Fri: E/O
Sat: Rosemary Tuscan chicken with couscous pilaf Update: L/O
Sun: Gingered carrot soup with Macademia nuts Update: L/O

(By the way, I'm not ready to do my Great Experiment with my diet, yet. I need to work up to it.)