How to remove ink from your couch

This morning Hollis ran excitedly into my room shouting pointing back at the living room. Intrigued I say, "What is it, Hollis?? Show me!"

He shouts in glee and sprints back towards the living room. "Bobba! Bobba!" he's yelling. I have no earthly clue what this means, but I follow him anyway. I'm thinking, "Great, he's dumped his 'bubbles' (or sparkling water to the rest of you) all over the place." Anthony is at the kitchen table pecking away at his computer between bouts of packing for his India trip. Blissfully unaware.

Hollis stops in front of the couch pointing, hopping, and positively rigid with excitement and agitation. He wants me to see what he's done.

And holy hell.

It's our first toddler casualty!!

I gasp, "Hollis! Couches are not for coloring on! We only color on paper!" which, incidentally, he has clasped in his free hand. By now Anthony's come over to see what all the commotion's about. I turn my gaze on him, "DADDY!" I hiss, "Why did you let this happen!!"

"Wha-?? You were with him!"

I guffaw, "No I wasn't! He followed your ass out here! I was alone in our room! He came and got me to show me this!"

Mind you, I wasn't angry, but more severely vexed, but that hasn't kept Hollis from retreating a few steps to watch the show between me and Anto. I come down to his sweet little chubby face and tell him again that couches aren't for coloring on, but let's draw on the paper and don't worry, he's not in trouble, but Daddy is - makes me laugh even recounting it. Big, oblivious Daddy who gave him the stinking pen in the first place.

Anthony and I discuss our next step to eradicate our little Pollack's pursuits. We have a bottle of some heavy duty miracle stain remover that we got when we purchased the couch, so let's use that, we agree. Only problem is, there's barely enough left to clean even one cushion.

"Don't worry. I'll clean it when I get back," Anthony declares.

"I don't want to have ink on my couch for a week and a half! You crazy??"


I start to blot up an inch of ink trail and stop. This is going to be a lot harder than I thought.

"Ok. You can clean it up when you get back," I reply. And flip over every cushion, wipe off any crumbs, and walk away.

Voila! Instant ink removal!!

How's that for some serious cleaning power??


  1. Haha! Now that is how it is done, Jessica! I can't even tell you how many time I have done that myself... and we get our couches cleaned 'professionally' every couple of years, too - the stains recently were SO BAD!

  2. This will sound strange, but Windex is A-MAY-ZING. I've used it to get ink out of my microfiber sofa and it even took red nail polish stain off my carpet. Just spray it on and then rub it gently with a clean, dry cloth...repeat as necessary. I would recommend against waiting for Ants to get home, as the longer it sits there the harder it'll be to get out. I feel sorta responsible as he was chatting to me when it happened! :D

  3. Hehe. I was just thinking "turn over the cushions", right before I scrolled down to see that you had done just that. We have a brown leather sofa. Great for babies. I can't tell you how much baby sick I have already sponged off it over the past year.

  4. Hahaha... the flip worked great! I'll have you know I'm storing these little tips away for future use.

  5. I read that with my husband and you made him laugh. Great post.

  6. This is genius...I kept reading to see what your secret was...and re-read, and re-read...then I saw the word "flip" - again...genius!

  7. When I have company coming over I just strategically place a couple toys or a table over the worst, darkest stains on our carpet. There is still peanut butter smeared on the armchair from two weeks ago but I haven't bothered to clean it. It's hard to care when you know it's just going to get trashed no matter what you do.

  8. This is going to sound very odd... but milk is fab at removing milk. Although, to be most effective kinda needs to be done when the stain is wet.. once a stain dries it's near on impossible to remove.

    Still, try soaking the covers (just the sections with ink on obviously) for 24 hours or so and with any luck it will still get rid of the cusions.